The Fear of Being Seen

Fear is a funny thing.

As I write this I’m feeling excited, nervous and sick all at the same time. I’m using different words to describe what is essentially the same physical reaction.

The reason? This newly revamped and rebranded website has gone live this evening and my very first podcast interview launches tomorrow.

And I’m not going to be able to control who sees what. In fact I’ve gone and shared a lot of my story too. And its not all rainbows and unicorns.

There’s still so much that I want to do on the site. To make it ‘perfect’ despite knowing that’s a complete illusion. I’d also love to re-record the podcast if am honest – it was done in one take! On top of that I also know that in order to get my brand out there I’m actively going to have to promote all this ‘being seen-ness’.

The truth is that I’ve been procrastinating over getting myself fully ‘out there’ for months. I’ve been dragging my heels about this website, completing my official diploma paperwork, getting back to this blog and writing an article that I promised to write.

I’ve been ‘busy’ with other things.

Which is BS.

Because I am The Queen of time creation. More on that in another post.

All it boils down to is FEAR.

See, no matter how much growth work we do the work is never done and despite having had consistent breakthroughs in putting myself out there for the past year the fear never disappears completely. It comes up time and time again. And its uncomfortable as hell.

But see where I have transformed is that I don’t let that stop me anymore.

And that’s the difference between those who get results and those who don’t. We act despite how we feel. Why? Because there is often something at stake.

The one thing that keeps coming up is the phrase ‘It’s not about you!’

And its not. If it were, there are plenty of other far more comfortable ways in which I could keep my ego happy.

People who move things forwards and get things done are the ones who act in the face of fear.

We act knowing that its inevitable we’ll be judged.

People won’t like us.

Once you accept that not everyone is going to like you, then you’re free to be and act.

So yes it may have taken me 3+ months longer than planned, but I’m here now. This is me.